Trailer Trash Fondue

[danaeris]

Trailer Trash Fondue Recipe

1 jumbo jar generic brand cheez whiz
1 six pack Coors Beer
a dash of Mrs. Sprinkle
1 bag of pretzels
1 package mini-wieners, cooked in the toaster
1 loaf wonder bread, toasted to a crisp and torn into chunks

Take a dirty pot left over from cookin' Kraft Mac n Cheese that still has the crud in the bottom, and put it over your cookfire. Dump the cheez in, and a splash of the Coors. OK, maybe a few splashes. Take a chug from the Coors can while yer at it, girl, yer not gettin' any younger! Stir it. Note: do not stir with a plastic fork, as the sturgeon general says that melted plastic is bad for you, or some shit like that. Take a chug from the Coors can, and then open another. Try to scrape the good starchy crud the Mac n Cheese left on the bottom of the pot up, and mix it into the fondue. Take another chug from the Coors can, and then crumple it up and toss it over your shoulder. Go smoke a cigarette; if yer already smokin' one, finish it and smoke another.

Once the fondue is bubbling real good and starting to burn, take it off the fire. Have another can of Coors!

Now you can dip the pretzels and wieners and bread in the fondue and eat it. You can stab them with yer pocket knife and then dip them in that way. No need for fancy fon-do forks. My favourite parts are the crunchy bits that burned, especially the leftover mac n cheese crunchy bits!

Have another can of Coors and a cigarette, and try not to drop any ash in the fondue.

Comments

[pyat.livejournal.com]

a dash of Mrs. Sprinkle

*Adjusts monocle* I think you mean, "a sprinkle of Mrs. Dash", m'dear. One would not want one's readers vainly searching the aisles of Walmart or Dollarama in vain!

[danaeris.livejournal.com]

What, you don't think the mistake adds charm to it? Also, any suggestions on how to make it more trailer trash-y?

[pyat.livejournal.com]

Pizza flavoured Vienna sausage. :)

[danaeris.livejournal.com]

hee.

I need to make a trailer trash dessert fondue. For dipping, I would definitely include:
hohos
pop tarts
twinkies

[plymouth.livejournal.com]

don't say "cubed" for the bread. "torn into chunks" might be more appropriate. :)

[danaeris.livejournal.com]

Good point, and, revised! :)

[cortneyofeden.livejournal.com]

Could always make the heat-source be an engine block.

[awfief.livejournal.com]

I didn't know Annie sprinkle was married! :)

[danaeris.livejournal.com]

Heh. And, hi there! Long time no see online.

I was thinking about you the other day. I was going through old old posts in LJ, and read a really long comment you gave me when I needed a smack upside the head. It reminded me of how great you were, and perhaps of how foolish I am to let friendships slide the way I sometimes do.

Anyway, who knows, maybe we'll bump into each other at Arisia. :)

[awfief.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Yes, I'll be there. My cell is 857-205-9786 if you want to try to plan a get-together. Yay!

bleeeaaugh!

[metalana.livejournal.com]

Ya shure this ain't from the White Cowbell Oklahoma website? Did you actually make this????? I love the adaptation of the deglazing technique - never thought to try beer.

And what's this Mrs Dash/Sprinkle thing? I suspect "big shake of salt" would suit the cuisine. As for the bread, "toasted real dark and torn up".

Well, if you are tweaking

[earthdragon.livejournal.com]

1 package mini-wieners, cooked in the toaster
1 loaf wonder bread, toasted to a crisp and torn into chunks

should be:

All them hot-dogs you ran outa buns for, cooked and chopped up ta bite size.

A loaf of old wonder bread from the half price bin, toasted, and ripped inta chunks the size of a coke cap.